Black Widow

Ahaha did the title get your attention? No I didn't murder him....yet....but I did find a black widow spider in the basement and will most definately be calling the bug man tomorrow. Can't deal with a spider...gives me the willies.

Now see the reason I even found the black widow is because I actually went to the basement and got close enough to the treadmill to touch it! Now that's progress. No the spider wasn't on the treadmill....it hasn't sat idle long enough for wildlife to have taken up residency yet. I was looking around to find the best spot to set up a tv down there so when I do get on the stupid thing I can at least watch some QVC and make myself happy by buying a nice little something for myself while I'm miserable for 30 minutes on the stupid treadmill. :-)

I think I will have a frosty beverage, sit back and read my book a while. You know come to think of it my favorite kind of book to read is murder mystery, detective, conspiracy, spy type stories. Maybe I do have a little of that black widow in me. "I kill you!" }:-(

LOL later ladies!!

Virgin-ia Blogger

Thanks for the invite...never blogged before, but I have dieted. Many, many times. Currently I'm a Weight Watcher.  I lost 26 pounds last year but have gained 8-10 back during the spring and summer months I didn't attend the meetings. I could offer up a few, actually many excuses why, (too busy, stress, a retirement, 2 new jobs and two graduations)...but bottom line is more calories in than out. My goal is to lose 15 more pounds. I want to be an after...oh yes I said it! WW works if you follow the plan,  journal and (shhh) exercise. Yeah right...we all know what it takes already...exercise is the hard part for me. Other than walking the dog that will never die...I'm just not very disciplined. I think this might be fun and supportive, so I'm in if you'll have me. Till next time~~~Swaz

Wonder Woman vs. The Gym Beeyatches

Why do these Gym Beeyatches wanna get somethin' started with me. Don't they know that I will haul off and Amazon Slap one of them into next week?

You know the type...Perky, skinny as shit, perfectly ponytailed, perfectly outfitted women. They usually don't work outside of the home (at least they don't have any babies/small children at home), but live at the the gym between 8:30 and 2pm while their rug rats are at school. They are the ladies who meet their girlfriends in the cafe or Sta.rbu.cks in their cute sweat suits prior to their workout and then stand in the freaking middle of the gym floor after - chitchatting about Bobby Joe's braces...AND they act like they own the freakin' gym. I hate them and want to be one of them at the same time. BEEEYATCHES!

I'm part of the Super Women Gym Beeyatch Group. We throw our gym stuff in a bag, often forgetting socks or a sports bra (OOOOH, I hate when that happens - ever work out in your super suit?) We come to the gym either at the crack of dawn or after 5 pm cause we are busy Saving the MFn' World AND keeping a home. We don't have time to get to the gym an hour before and stay and hour after. We got shyat to do...save the world, defeat tyranny, cook dinner, clean house, homework & throw a freakin dinner party without so much as breaking a sweat. We don't have coordinated workout outfits NOR do we often match. We are there to get a workout and go home or back to our Super Duties.

Well, this morning was the 1st day back to the official Super Duties. I had gassed up the Invisible Plane for a business trip to a God forsaken hole in the wall and since I didn't have to leave until 3, I decided to go to the gym to take a Total Conditioning class that I've discovered and love. When I got there 5 minutes before class (not an hour prior with my Cappuccino in hand), it is packed. I found a spot way up at the front of the class (right in front of the mirror), but there are barely any hand weights of any significance left. The instructor says that we will have to share weights and starts the class. The Gym Beeyatch next to me (in her perfectly coordinated Ni.k.ie outfit and matching shoes) has 3 sets of weights (17.5, 15, 12lbs). She is only using the 17.5lbers so I ask if I could use her 12's. She looked at me with sheer derision (if laser beams came from this heffers eyes, I would have died right there), ROLLED HER MFn' EYES and said nothing. Just went right on with the workout. Do you now how hard it was NOT to slap the sweat off her smug face? I snatched the weights up and didn't even think to give em back.

Lord, being Wonder woman and holding back on using my super powers on ordinary mortals is really challenging me. I wanted (and could have) to kill her SOOOOOO bad.

It was a great workout despite the Gym Beeyatch. Next time I plan to get there earlier and taker her freakin' spot. She what she's got to say then.

FORGIVE THEM...FOR THEY KNOW NOT WHAT THEY DO.

day 2

I guess today is the second day even though yesterday was the official 1st day and I had black eye peas and cornbread for supper. But it was for the greater good of the over all cause see. I need all the luck I can get and being moderately superstitious I had to have to black eyed peas and cornbread. I guess I should weigh myself sometime soon. I will say my ultimate long term goal is to eventually lose 50-60 pounds. I lost 40 over this past summer but will admit I have gained at least 10 back. It felt most excellent to lose that weight and have people notice and mention it. I helped keep me motivated and I physically felt a lot better. What I did is cut way back on sweets and pepsi. I admit I am a pepsiholic. Drank lots of water, didn't eat late night snacks and really only ate when I was hungry not just because it was lunch time or breakfast time. If I wasn't hungry I just wouldn't eat. Now I know I'll never be a size 2 but I can at least get down to my game weight even if it was 25 yrs ago that I weighed in at that amount. I suppose that's it for today. Drive on ladies.....the best is yet to come!

Tips from Dr. Ian Smith

We are all starting 2008 with new fit & fabulous body goals. (BTW - where is everyone's first post with their goal?). I know that I'm not the only SuperWoman who is gonna lose some poundage...I'm going for an even 40...what are you ladies goin' for?

And I'll be damned if I let hot_tamale's husband group of men do better than us. It is just not in the realm of possibility.

Anyway, here are some tips I just read from Dr. Ian Smith and The 50 Million Pound Challenge.
1. Get real and be specific. Write down three or four realistic goals that you can stick to. For example, "I will try to lose one poud of body fat every week. I will walk for 30 minutes, minimum, five days a week." Avoid fantasy-land goals that will only frustrate you.

Here are my goals:

• Drink 1/2 my body weight in water every day.
• Lose 40lbs by Sept 1, 2008 (that's 5 lbs/month).
• No carbs after 4pm.

2. Get prepared. Throw away all the junk, the processed and the "bingeable" food NOW, and replace them with fresh, whole foods, like lots of water and veggies. During a lifestyle change, if you fail to plan, then you plan to fail!

I am purchasing a new scale that also determines body fat.

3. Get support. Whether it's your best friend, neighbor, spoiuse or pet. It helps to have some nonjudgemental and nurturing support when trying to lose weight, especially during trying times.

That's what I got all of my Super Hero Ladies for!

4. Make daily notes. Research has shown that keeping track of your daily exercise and food intake in a journal or notebook will increase the likelihood of success. The key is to hold yourself acountable.

Between this blog and my food journal, I can't fail.

5. Start small. Choose an activity you can do anywhere, anytime. You don't need to have a gym membership to get fit.

Nope ya don't, but I'm using my gym and my trainer from hell.

D-day/Starting day

This is a day that I have talked about for two months, so tell me why this morning after I finished a wonderful breakfast I said "oh boy, I should have started my plan today" but that's ok, I will go get "Leg Magic" today and that will fix it (all my problems). Well it is 9:15pm no "Leg Magic" and I have officially failed today. I did purchase a video to help me get lean and in shape (more warrior like, my outfit is getting a little snug). I just cannot wait to try out the "10 Minute Solution" and "tone those trouble spots" Oh yes, did I mention I did try to get on scale today and discovered it is broken. (it is true) I was speaking to a Friend and she said I thought you wanted to lose 10 pounds I am still laughing. Although the scale did not work, you all can assume that 10 pounds is not my goal. Hopefully this week I will be able to get one of those high-end scales that measure the dreaded body fat. It really wasn't meant for today, so new date January 2, 2008. Now as the Warrior Princess I plan to attack this weight issue like any other problems that have come up. The good thing about the weight issue it is in plain sight and every time I put on my Warrior panties I am reminded that there is work to be done. For those of you who may not know Xena is a warrior with a dark and sometimes shameful past. A chain of events in her life led her to a new direction and a new purpose. No longer a warlord (witch) hell-bent on becoming the "Destroyer of Nations," (head witch) she has chosen to fight for what she calls the "Greater Good" (slim and sexy and just plain old HOT) and hopes for redemption of her past sins. Her great courage knows no bounds; fear does not speak her name, whether her foe be faceless or not. She has only one weakness......(FSA )FOOD/SNACKS/ALCHOL

Happy New Year!!!

Oh my GOD! All I can say is it's a good day to start watching what I eat because after the party I had at my house last night I sure can't think about food. Uggg :-/ My tamales are not so hot this morning. I think my husband has gone outside of his mind again. He's got the nerve to challenge us already! He claims to have a group at his job, including himself, that thinks they can do better than we can. Nothing I love more than to prove him wrong.
So all you phat and fabulous women that have signed up here already, hike up your panties girls...to my office mate, keep me off those bagles. I want to look good when summer rolls through this year. I'll be wearing that target size before you know it and will show you the tag in the back of my hoochie mama jeans to prove it! Yeah baby...
The treadmill is calling.......good thing I'm hard of hearing in one ear and it's all the way in the basement because it won't see the bottom of my shoes today. I will go for a short walk later though around the block down to the river. Gotta start some where.
Happy 2008 ladies......it has to better than 2007. 99% of this 07 just sucked big slimey rotten eggs. It can only go up while my weight goes down.